• Essay About Love and Literary Taste - Books - Review - New York Times
  Anyone who is rejecting someone based on literary taste is clearly clinging to some theory of an ideal partner ==> mommy issues ==> do not pass go, go get a therapist
  (tags: Grody)

1. I recognize my recent zealotry (e.g., spending $675 yesterday at East West on things like, um, energizing crystal baths) on all things alter-na-tive and new agey is not unlike the devotion with which I took up Mormonism
2. However I would like to point out that I was Mormon for technically less than six weeks until finding new religion in the form of a Canuckian hockey player, vs. being into this whole universe-is-integrated-and-so-am-I schtick for going on 2+ years
3. But I guess my self-acceptance of my own journey — which began with giving myself permission to abandon old modes of thinking and living — chucking it — has given me the ability to accept the journeys of others
4. Which is why I no longer have a problem with organized religion
5. Even though adherents to organized religion were deeply judgy-wudgy and unkind to me, resident atheist-spawn-of-a-Buddhist-and-a-Methodist-turned-agnostic
6. But this is what love and kindness and respect is
7. Loving and being kind and respectful to others, regardless of how they treat you
8. Which is why, as I leaf through my zine from my undergraduate days, even though that version of me was unkind to others, and aggressively unkind to herself …
9. I love and respect her anyway
10. So this is really where time management comes from
11. Being respectful to your own time. Deciding for yourself where to devote your energies. Owning your temporal pipes.
12. And realizing that the time of others also demands respect.

It’s Sunday! Last night I turned power out at 8 p.m., lit candles, took hot shower, then realized my cleaning lady accidentally broke my tea pot. Boo hoo.

Irregardless, I think I am going to do the power out ritual on a monthly basis. It’s such a nice opportunity to sit, be consciously quiet, and be with myself. So what starts out as a kernel of treating the earth with love, kindness, and respect, becomes and opportunity to treat myself with love, kindness, and respect.

Which makes sense. Seeing as we’re connected. I am you am the earth am this orchid am this leftover carrot cake from Asa’s second birthday party am my bootleg Tulip chair that I ordered last July and I just picked up yesterday afternoon (hereafter referred to as the Turip chair).

Nyum nyum.

• Harmonious 3-Wheel Motion: Localization
  Walmart - Shenzhen sells crocodile. Love it.
  (tags: marketing EatMe)
• Deep water intensive healing baths
  Serendipitously, I placed 3 of these in my basket w/o knowing that Echo was in the building, and then went to her presentation and got to meet her!!! I am so excited to try!!
  (tags: spa OTP GiftIdeas)

I want to share with you a little trick regarding getting things done.

Oftentimes people will send me emails asking me questions or asking for my time. Right now I have 657 unread emails in my personal account, and 705 unread emails in my work account.

“705 unread emails!” you might think. “It’s a wonder you haven’t been fired!”

Au contraire, mon frere. The fact is in my 9 official years of full-time capitalizing, which came off the heels of 4 years of part-time go-goodering and a lifetime of entrepreneuring, I’ve been able to get a ton of shit done. It’s like my old boss / coach TT always said: “Work smarter. Not harder.”

Ain’t that the truth. Working harder means reading every single email and getting back to everyone super-promptly. The problem with this is that it assumes that everyone else’s time is more important than yours. And when you make that assumption, you basically guarantee that you will forever be in a job where you are the least important.

Now, this is one of the reasons I can get shit done: I don’t waste my time on shit that isn’t important. And nine times out of ten, I am in a better position to determine if something is important. Which means that the request via email isn’t important unless I say it is, and it means I’m not going to read your email unless:

• I need something from you, at which point, I read the three most recent emails from you, address your needs, and then follow-up by asking you to give me what I need
• The subject line is related to something that I’ve decided is important

This is how I’m able to get a ton of shit done. When you think about it (and yes, I have thought about it), all through school I was able to score in the 99th percentile on standardized tests that took my classmates an hour to finish. I was done in forty minutes, tops. I could read by age three and took calculus as a high school sophomore.

I get shit done.

I do it well.

I don’t read your emails.

So here’s the little trick I’ve learned regarding getting people like me to pay attention to you:

• Get them to need something from you. If they don’t need you, then you need them. That’s the power dynamic, and get used to it, and figure out how to work around it.
• If they do need something from you, when they ask for it, don’t give it to them until they give you what you need. Duh. “I’d be happy to provide that report, and I’ll get to it right away. Before I begin, however, I’d benefit from some context regarding the shit that I need from you, big lady.”
• But usually, they don’t need anything from you. So you need to respect the power dynamic and pay it its propers. Ask yourself: how much time do I need from this person? Sometimes you just need them to give you a POV on a document. Okay — how long will it take them to read the document? Will it be easier if you walk them through it? Based on that, you need to:
  • Push time onto their calendar to walk them through the document. If you are in the same office as them, put a hard copy of the document onto their chair so they can read on their commute. If not, and if you have time, send them a physical copy of the document. On a post-it, say, “I’ll get some time on your calendar to walk you through this.” Include your business card as well if they aren’t going to know who the f— you are.
    • This is also the golden key to the crapper checklist re: How To Get People Much Higher On The Food Chain To Know You Are Alive Even If You Are Not 5′10″ And Of Indeterminate Ethnic Origin
  • When you’re pushing time on their calendar, do it for WHEN THEY ARE AVAILABLE. Don’t be the asshole that’s going to try and think that your little document is more important than what they’ve already got planned. Remember: smart people are the most qualified to decide what’s most important and how they should allocate their time. Don’t be presumptuous.
  • If you can’t see their availability, don’t push a request for any less than two business days away. Even successful, accomplished people don’t want to feel like failures, and if you don’t give someone time to successfully deliver to you, then they will feel like they have failed, and this will invoke shame, and once you shame someone, you are up shit’s creek and they will marshal their resources towards seeing you eliminated, peon. In the meeting request, state, “I’d love to walk you through this document that I’ve attached as part of the meeting request / left on your desk / FedExed to you and solicit your guidance, but if this time is not good, please do feel free to suggest an alternative.” Now, see how respectful of this person’s time your request is? And see how you’ve couched it as them giving you guidance? This has recognized their power and makes them feel special. Most people want to be helpful. You just need to set them up for success to give out that advice and … get what you need.
  • Let’s say you don’t need to walk them through it. Well, they still need to block out time to read it. So send a meeting request titled: Read this document, or something like that, and let them know they should feel free to move the meeting request to a time that works best for them, and that you can be reached at << your phone number >> to discuss should any questions arise during the reading of it. And then ask that they ping you after they read to give your feedback. This respects the busy-ness of their schedules and ensures that you get what you need.
• Sometimes, you need to get feedback from someone on a regular basis. Determine how regular, and how much time you need, and get on their calendars.

If I need something from someone I never assume that an email or a phone call will do the trick. Sure, sometimes it does, and I get through to most people because most people like me (and I return the favor) and generally, I’m one of the more entertaining people in any one person’s life. Look, don’t hate, but let’s be honest: how many Jello wrestling dress-wearing shoulder-tossing Scrabulatin’ half breeds do you know? According to Facebook, I am more desired than 86% of people, so most people want to talk to me and will answer my call.

But let’s say that the person I need something from is currently talking to someone who is more desired than 97% of people, including me? I respect the reality of the power structure and block out time on their calendar.

And then, I figure out ways to make sure they need things from me, so that the power dynamic can shift in the other direction.

This is how I manage up the food chain, across the food chain, and down the food chain. This is how I get it done.

If you keep these things in mind, I guarantee that you will find yourself getting a ton more done — and I mean, meaningful impacts. Not just running the baseline or looking busy. Not working harder.

Working smarter.

As of 3/31/2009, this post has relocated to a new home at:  Time.

Because I’ve been working my balls off, that’s why.  Four hours on Sunday and then it’s been 12 - 15 hour days since, with the exception of ten hours on Wednesday followed by my writing class followed by Emmy B.’s birthday.

It’s hour 14.  I’m going to crawl into bed and nestle into a book I’m reading, then wake up early tomorrow to crank some more in time to celebrate my boyfriend’s second birthday.

(Eew, not really my boyfriend!)

Goodbye, balls.  Goodnight, moon.  Hello CRACK WEEK

Um, why come they don’t just print a subway map on the front and back of our metro cards?

Shout-out and thank you to New York magazine for their recent direct mail solicitation.  I needed to update my furry, pulp-y wallet subway line map card.

• Design and the Elastic Mind
  Who is going to this with me?
  (tags: ToDo)

• eclectica - salvaged furniture & accessories
  I got this great throw pillow made from a vintage towel during The Grove’s art walk on 3/16
  (tags: miami crafty)
• I’m scared to feel better …
  Analyze THIS
  (tags: psychology)